Tecmo Bowl: Kickoff review

Tecmo Super Bowl for the NES is hands-down my favorite game on the 8-bit console and one of my favorite games of all time. It’s the reason why I have an old toaster model hooked up to a tube TV bedside – just in case I want to get a few Montana to Rice seventy yard bombs in before hitting the sack. So it was with great excitement that I awaited this DS revival of the classic game – indeed, it is one of the sole reasons why I went out and purchased a DS (along with the release of Bangai-O, see below).

Largely, the game does not disappoint. The gameplay is as sharp as it ever was on the NES – you have pinpoint control over the ball carrier who stops and turns on a dime, cycling through your receivers is a bit easier thanks to the ability to scroll both forward and back through your options, and mashing the “A” button to avoid/create tackles simply never, ever gets old. All the plays from the original game are here, and you can create a playbook for any team. Classic animations, like the super high jump and catch, the slip-and-slide style “dive,” the stilted waving of the hands of the scoring team and drooped over disappointment of the scored-upon team are all there. The awful “flicker” problem of the NES game has been wiped away.

The season mode is just as addictive as it was in 1991; you earn points with ever big play you make over the course of a game, and these eventually go towards improving your players’ attributes and bestowing them with special abilities. The game will track team upgrade and stats over a period of up to five seasons. Something noteworthy for me was the fact that the game now correctly tabulates your quarterback’s rating (no more bizarre “215.3” for your fictional QB Eagles).

While the league is comprised of fake teams and players, you are free to edit just about everything – creating the NFL teams with their correct names and colors is a relatively painless process. While the team names are fictional, the cities are not, and each is organized into the correct conference and division even before you start editing (e.g. the “WTC East” is comprised of the teams from New England, New York, Buffalo, and Miami).

My problems with the game come in the areas of audio and specific stat-tracking. Like the original game, there is music that starts as soon as the ball is in play. While the NES tunes had a sort of playful, unintrusive charm, the tunes in Kickoff are a little bit more annoying and abrasive. You have the option to turn them off, but it’s sort of disappointing that the developers – clearly cognizant of the fact that they were targeting those that played the original game to death – didn’t tailor the music to match the charming, 8-bit style graphics. A bigger issue for me comes in the form of stat tracking during the season. In the NES game, you could scroll around your roster at any point and bring up a “player card” that indicated that player’s accumulated stats in a number of categories for that season. There is no such option in Kickoff – the only way to see an individual player’s stats is if they are among the league leaders – in which case that player will appear in the list that can be accessed at any time between games. I know this is only a minor (if any) annoyance to others, but to me it warranted a full letter grade drop – part of the fun of playing a season of Tecmo Bowl is keeping close tabs on how productive each of my players is during the season.

Despite the relatively minor problems, I am having a great time with Tecmo Bowl: Kickoff. It’s terrific to have a portable version of one of the best sports games ever, and it’s one that I would recommend to any and all fans of the original series.

Bangai-O Spirits Review

Treasure’s little portable version of one of the Dreamcast’s most imaginative and addictive yet underappreciated titles truly does the original game justice and throws some added depth into the mix. For those uninitiated, gameplay involves piloting a tiny mech around a battlefield in search of a variable number of “targets” which must be destroyed in order to complete the level. Along the way, numerous enemies and obstacles are encountered, most of which fire an inordinate amount of missiles, lasers, and bombs in the direction of your mech.

Luckily, you are pretty much armed to the teeth, yourself. Before each level, you can outfit your mech with two primary weapons, assigned to two of the face buttons, which range from homing missiles to a stream of destructive spheres that bounce around like ping pong balls. You also have melee options such as bats and swords, and your mech has a shoulder-charge move that can be devastating to lower level enemies. However, the key to mastering this title comes in learning the intricacies of the EX system – “smartbomb”-style weapons mapped to the shoulder buttons. Also coming in a variety of types, the mass destruction caused by EX weapons increases in relation to the amount of enemy fire on the screen and its proximity to your mech. Thus, in order to do the most damage, it behooves the player to essentially wait until a huge stream of deadly enemy missiles is within a few pixels distance from his mech before launching the EX attack. It’s an incredibly addictive little risk-reward system that never really gets old, even across the 160 (!) varied levels that ship with the game.

Because the understanding which weapons to pick for the different levels is so critical, the game adopts sort of a hybrid shooter-puzzle-game feel, adding to the inherent addictiveness in blowing stuff up. The level of challenge is extremely high, but you can skip around between any of the stages at any time in the case that you get stuck on one (or a few). There’s even an intuitive level editor that’s actually fun to play around with.

The main flaw with this title is its technical problems – the DS simply isn’t powerful enough to handle to ridiculous amount of enemies and projectiles that can appear on the screen at any given moment, so slowdown is pretty much rampant. Regardless, it never seems to ruin any of the levels, and is even oddly helpful in a few tight spots. Though personal best clear times and high scores are dutifully recorded and saved for each and every level, a minor problem is that the game doesn’t keep a simple running tally of all the levels you’ve cleared. As you clear more and more stages, it can get a little tedious flipping around the menus to find out which stages you haven’t tackled yet.

Overall, this is a terrific addition to the DS’ action/shooter lineup and should be in the collection of anyone who enjoys a stiff 2D challenge.

WWE Smack Down! Vs. Raw 2008

“Taker, Taker, Taker….” You can hear the sounds of an earth-shattering ovation and at the same time a silence of awe as The Undertaker flies over the top rope at the grandest stage of them all at Wrestlemania 23. It would eventually lead to the uproar of excitement when he lands his vintage tombstone pile driver for the victory and the world heavyweight championship. 2007 was truly a great year in WWE history with all the amazing matches and rivalries that took place, so too was the much anticipated wrestling game Smack Down! Vs. Raw 2008 which would continue it’s franchise on PS3 and debut on Xbox 360. After Smack Down! Vs. Raw 2007 gained an impressive degree of new features including all new stamina meters, a fight in the crowd area (problems with it to be discussed later), the exciting money in the bank ladder match, a superb new season mode, the return of create-a-ppv, and the true to life graphics there were minor flaws.

I must first start by the new roster, specifically the exclusion of Brian Kendrick, Paul London, and Ashley. These three superstars proved to be the future Team Extreme by all accounts. Like the best tag team in WWE history (The Hardy’s) Kendrick and London displayed the same high-flying and death-defying maneuvers that made The Hardy’s famous. They also held the tag team titles for nearly a year. Instead of the thrill of being them in the game we’re left disappointed. The roster, however, was the least of my concerns. The next item in question would have to be the “buried alive” match that (developer) Yuke’s has severely mistaken for a casket match. Let me make it clear Yukes. There are NO CASKETS (!!!) in a “buried alive” match. The purpose of a buried alive match is to throw the opponent in the ground, and then bury them alive with dirt. Why is this concept so difficult? It has nothing to do with caskets.

Next are the ridiculous announcing and victory celebrations. Why is it so hard to get any of it right? I will give the order of a superstar’s announcement the way it’s supposed to be. First, you announce where they’re from, their weight, then say whether or not they are a champion, and say their name. How it that so mind-boggling? What really gets me is the fact that the actual announcers should’ve let them know exactly how they do it and fix any problems they heard. Likewise, why can’t the superstars have the same celebrations they’ve had for years?  Don’t make up celebrations that are, no offense, stupid and horrendous, not to mention insulting. Since when did The Phenom ever smile in his career and hug people after a tag team victory. It’s absolutely absurd. Well, now that I’m done raving and complaining about SvR 2007 lets get into Smack Down! Vs. Raw 2008.

You would think that the main goal of SvR 2008 was to fix the many, if not minor problems of the previous installment. We would see a new updated roster, new matches, excelled realism, and accurate announcing and celebrations. Unfortunately the developer decided to spit and trample on all of those areas of focus. It’s like waking up and finding out that Vince McMahon, (greatest owner of professional wrestling) took one big monkey crap on the industry he built, leaving him with a bunch of no-talented washouts from TNA wrestling with the exception of Kurt Angle. I wasn’t at all pleased by this injustice made by THQ. First on the list is the utterly pathetic and depleted roster that made horrible sacrifices, excluded nearly the entire tag team division, and added some mediocre superstars to the mix. How horrible were the sacrifices you ask? Let’s see here, Lance Cade, Trevor Murdoch, Shelton Benjamin, Charlie Haas, and Hulk Hogan for example were not a part of the roster. Now on to the excluded individuals: Brian Kendrick, Paul London, Deuce and Domino, The Major Brothers, Jimmy Wang Yang, Shannon Moore, Maria, Beth Phoenix, Victoria, Chris Jericho, Bid Daddy V and Lita and Trish (who should have been made legends) While some additions were indeed glorious such as Jeff Hardy, MVP, Ashley, Kelly Kelly, CM Punk, and Elijah Burke the other additions were not. Why they decided to put Cryme Time who are the worst tag team of all time into the mix with Marcus Con what….who is this guy and why do we care is beyond me. I’m surprised they didn’t put in The Miz while they’re at it. Major disappointment in the roster and oh yeah, Maria was in the game but you couldn’t be her…brilliant move there, Yukes…..clap…..clap….clap.

That doesn’t even come close to the worst part of this game. What was that word again, was it… REALISM. THG, through Yuke’s, has managed to make this game less realistic then 2007 and 2006 combined. In 2006 you had the sleeper submission maneuver which was really cool (strange why that didn’t remain constant with the next two) and 2007 had the stamina meter which when tired you hold down circle to regain your strength. It’s was a perfect concept that was the most realistic. 2007 also had that great concept called weight differential, you know, meaning Candice Michelle can’t possibly power slam The Great Khali. Well 2008’s version completely ignored all of that. No stamina meters, no sleeper submission maneuvers, a whacked out weight differential, not to mention a complete failure to know what there is to know about WWE Superstars, which brings me to my next outrage. Obviously Yuke’s does not know that Jeff Hardy’s two special moves are the Twist of Fate and The Swanton Bomb. This does not include The Whisper in the Wind which is NOT Jeff’s finishing move. Likewise Batista only has one special move, The Batista Bomb….period. The Spine Buster is NOT his special move and should be used whenever you want. Furthermore why does everyone have Undertaker’s Patented DDT, it only belongs to the Undertaker and Undertaker alone. Speaking of Undertaker, you can’t even do his suicide dive OVER the top rope or his vintage jumping leg drop on the outside, unacceptable. (Sigh)

I wish these were the only problems with the game, but I’m afraid there is still more to come. Perhaps I should get to it quick to finally convince all you diehard WWE fans, me included why you should buy this game. There are some great qualities to it after all and I may have a bias in the overall rating of the game being a WWE fan. However, I don’t agree with Gamepro’s rating whatsoever. Getting back to the negatives, remember when I said they should’ve fixed irritant announcements and celebrations, as well as the buried alive match? Well no, Wrong. They fixed absolutely nothing. Probably the final complaint is the new matches (plural means more than 1) They literally have only one new match which was the ECW extreme rules match. Wow, that’s terrific….bravo. So they didn’t feel the need to include the stretcher match, inferno match, Punjabi prison match, and the street fight, unbelievable. Lastly there isn’t a create a pay per view mode which was my favorite feature of them all. Ehhhhh I’d like to take Triple H’s sledgehammer and…….never mind. Now the moment every WWE fan is waiting for.

 Let us take a look at the positives and why Smack Down Vs. Raw 2008 is worthy to purchase. No one can deny the amazing state of the art graphics, especially the crispness of the championship belts. The overall features of every superstar from head to toe are phenomenal. The many grapples and counters that you can utilize are also outstanding. From countering virtually everything from special moves to submission moves to amazing, accurate high flying moves over the ropes and off them (Rey Mysterio and Jeff Hardy are the best in the game and the most fun to be) The returning ultimate control moves are great and the struggle submission system which uh…they already had which doesn’t make it new. I guess you can say the countering of those moves are different but the concept is the same. New features like tournament mode make a great addition to the game allowing one to compete in king of the ring tournaments and beat the clock tournaments. Those are great to play with numerous people. The season mode is far superior now than any before it for more accurate scenarios (not completely accurate) that add depth to the season. Of course the ability to set tables on fire is also very cool and all the new environmental hotspots are quite tremendous (only problem being that you can’t actually fight IN the crowd but rather in one space) The entrances, especially John Cena’s and The Undertaker’s are very true to the superstars and really make you feel your watching them live. It’s still a very impressive game on those levels and really fun to play for all those true WWE fans out there. After all it does have the major superstars in it which is always fantastic. My final statement to THQ and Yuke’s………….. IMPROVE THE NEXT ONE…..make it TRUE TO WWE if ya smell what this WWE fan is cooking.

The Good ‘ol Days.

Sure, sometimes I fantasize of owning a gaming company. Who doesn’t? I like to think to myself, what might I do differently? How would I figure to maintain pace with this particular market?

Believe it or not, one of my strategies might be to position myself behind the “chasing better graphics” curve. That is just Zeno’s paradox, my friends and we’re talking about games. Call me old fashioned, but I’d want my developers to make great games, not direct their efforts to chasing polygons. Sure, visualization is good, but it’s not everything. I think Nintendo has proven this time and again (the Wii has the largest install base).

In the end, a steaming pile of excrement with dynamic light does not make it any less offensive to the remaining senses. Here’s a nice little example of what I mean:

This is an eye:

The brilliance is in it’s simplicity. I mean, what else do you really need  than a mustard-colored blob? Answer: NOTHING! BECAUSE MARIO IS FRICKIN’ AWESOME!

If I had to “suffer” through the 8-bit era, I think everyone should. Only then can you appreciate a good game. Not that anyone can claim that they really suffered through this era. In fact, Atari and NES brought forth some of the best gaming experiences of my life. Remember, long before there was “online play” you actually had to have physically existing friends.

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy good graphics. I don’t think it would have killed Nintendo to put a better GPU in the Wii. Though, to be honest, I’d rather see innovative game-play above all else. Above all else. All the graphics in the world could not save Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing.

I’ve done the FPSs. I’ve been online and I’ve been offline. I’ve done RPGs, MMORPGs, JRPGs, platformers, you name it. I’ve done the good ones and I’ve done the bad ones, and like any solid gamer I wish I could say the same about my teenage love life (yyeeeowwza!). Though, when was the last time that someone came to the table with some idea e.g. two Italian plumbers scurrying all about, eating mushrooms, navigating through the public sewage system, breaking bricks with their heads, and warding off flesh eating muscipula in a majestic mushroom kingdom? It just doesn’t happen. Hasn’t happened in years. These days it’s all about polygons and shaders.

I lust for the good ‘ol days when I could manipulate all that filckering 256 x 240 action with only two shiny red buttons. Analog sticks are for sissies, all hail the directional pad.

Oh, and what’s with adding all of the unnecessary additional dimensions to great game franchises of yesteryear? Super Mario Galaxy, Super Mario 64, Super Paper Mario with “dimension flipping” and all that tom-foolery? While these are all undeniably great games, I still say we take a step back to the tried and true side-scroller.

Ah but I’m wasting my breath. I just need to accept that gone are the days when you would befriend even the biggest of nerd solely to have at it in Castle Wolfenstein on his parents new beige PC. Gone are the days of the Power Glove and blockbuster motion pictures such as The Wizard (1989) starring Fred Savage.

Those were the days. Scurrying off to your parents’ basement with hopes of achieving the best possible time on World 1-1 of SMB while listening to filthy stand-up comedy on cassette.

What am I doing now, in 2009? I’m shoving batteries into my “Wiimote” and waving it around like a lunatic, all the while wondering what the neighbors must think. It doesn’t have to be this way.

Extreme Combat

When I survey the latest gaming scene, I find myself getting fairly bitter and jaded every now and again. Don’t get me wrong, I can enjoy a good first person shooter. It’s just that there are too friggin’ many. Seriously. Call of Duty 4 can run at 60 framers per second, offer the greatest online multiplayer in the history of the internet, cook me dinner, clean the house, and offer a high colonic every three weeks or so. It’s like the fourth major FPS release this year, I’ve had my fill, I don’t want it. Other than that, EA has effectively lost any of the sports-game credibility it had on the 16-bit consoles yet constantly churns out its EA-TRAX-laden garbage every year, just about every semi-significant Hollywood release is paired with some crap game, and too many game developers think we’re all a bunch of wannabe gangstas looking to jack a car and punch a hooker to the strains of “Get it Shorty” or whatever nonsense drek pollutes the radio waves nowadays.

 

It isn’t really as bad as all that, but, like I said, every now and again it feels that way. In reality, games can be grouped into two very broad categories: Cinema-based and Gameplay-based. The Cinema-based games are rooted in storytelling and atmosphere. Examples are Bioshock, Flashback, and basically any JRPG. It isn’t that the gameplay is necessarily bad in any of these games, its just that the story is the primary reason to play them – you it’s what brings you back and forces you to finish. The Gameplay-based games (often) eschew any sort of deep story or elaborate cutscene, and rely on gameplay as the main “hook.” There sorts of games were a dime a dozen back in the 8 and 16-bit days. Remember when 2D Vs. Fighters and shoot ‘em ups were all the rage? Ever encounter a game from either genre with a deep storyline? The technology didn’t exist in these sorts of games for impactful, dramatic storytelling.

 

Thank the heavens Gameplay-based games still exist — in the form of a sub-genre known as “extreme combat.” These are the games that actually still keep a “score” of some sort, and will commonly “grade” your efforts following each mission – regardless of the immersion breaking nature of such progress screens. These games consist primarily of fighting hordes of enemies and bosses, memorizing an extensive list of moves, weapons, and combos, leveling up your character, and last but not least, developing super-human reflexes and overall Godlike eye-hand mastery. This compelling blend of four genres (respectively, the classic beat ‘em up, the Vs. fighter, the RPG, and the 2D shoot ‘em up) makes this the best kind of game available today. I thought about making a list of the games that qualify for this sub-genre, but in reality – unfortunate, but not surprising given my laments at the outset – only two series truly qualify (sorry, no God of War – that series is essentially Golden Axe in 3D). If you are still into games for the sake of playing, you know, games, we at Gamerbros heartily recommend these titles

Devil May Cry & Devil May Cry 3

 

The Devil May Cry series originated in 2001, and the original was one of the first games of consequence on the PS2. What I like most about DMC is that each battle feels like a fight for your life, even in the early stages of the game against the “lower level” enemies.

 

Each enemy attack pattern must be carefully discerned prior to countering or deciding to strike first. And, like any great skill-based game, it is entirely possible to go through the entire game without getting hit once (though if you manage this, you are some sort of gaming hero and/or massive nerd) – this gives the game an old school, 2D shmup style vibe. Commit to memory what I refer to as the “DMC Axiom” – all attacks are telegraphed and all are avoidable – and the relentless difficulty of both of these titles becomes manageable if one remains on his or her proverbial toes at all times.

 

Ninja Gaiden / Ninja Gaiden Black / Ninja Gaiden Sigma

 

Ninja Gaiden Black’s free-form, free-flowing combat engine is as simple or complex as you want it to be. Sure, pure button-mashers will be beautifully annihilated, but NGB is intuitive enough for casual gamers to pick up and hold their own against lesser enemies (of which there are few). Dig deeper, though, and you’ll discover a game that actually makes you feel like a friggin ninja.

 

 

Power up your dragon sword, master the endless array of throws, slashes, counters, blocks, and super-charged ninpo attacks, and you’ll be taking down Doku’s demonic forces with the brutal elegance and efficiency, probably while standing and screaming at your TV in sheer joy. Due to the spot-on controls, even Ninja Gaiden’s platforming elements are an exercise in gaming excellence.

 

Extreme Combat games are still relatively “new,” and it’s troubling to see that the genre isn’t exploding like some others (especially on Microsoft or Nintendo consoles). That being said, if you have any passing interest in racking up 300-hit combos and slicing up hordes of baddies, these games stand in a league of their own and are must-haves.

Just Play it

With almost every new release, gamers far and wide are whining about game length. These people sulk and bitch that their games are becoming too short. Great gameplay – awesome presentation – memorable story – who cares, the whole thing friggin ends in 6 hours and 48 minutes! For the record, I urge our overanxious colleagues to look past this “problem.”

The way I see it, developers are charged with the task of hitting the consumer with an engaging concept, holding their attention for some time, an praying that the final product was enjoyable enough to do it all again. Games are supposed to be temporary escapes from reality – not everlasting grinds to satisfy some players’ OCD. I get the feeling that some kids game today with one eye on the screen, and the other on the clock.

Off the top of my head, here’s a quick list of recent “short” games that are every bit worth a player’s time an attention:

1) Kameo: Elements of Power – beautiful artistic design, simple but fun puzzles and clever boss battles make Kameo a great 8-10 hour romp.

2) God of War 1 and 2 – in my opinion, action-combat games should be *limited* to eight hours! SCEA serves up a pair of great button-mashers that will satisfy casual hack n slash (is this even a genre anymore?) fans.

3) Condemned: Criminal Origins – my brother and I blew through the majority of this game in a single day, screaming like little girls the whole way. Awesome first-person adventure that will really rattle your nerves.

On the other hand, here’s a quick list of games that actually suffer from being too long.

1) Assassin’s Creed – play it for 4 to 6 hours and you’ll swear its everything it was supposed to be when first introduced at E3 – but after the 12-hour mark, you may start to wish the story would just wrap up. (full review to follow)

2) The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess – I’m on the game’s second temple and logged 15 hours already – hey, its Zelda and I’m a big fan of Nintendo’s holy trinity, but 50 hours seems way too long for an action-adventure game.

3) Metroid Prime 2: Echoes – holy crap – just when you think its over, Samus is sent on a grueling key hunt! Artificial game lengthening is something you wouldn’t think Retro would do considering its groundbreaking 2001 Metroid entry.

I understand that people want to get the “most” for their money, but it seems like some gamers would rather sink $60 in a 25-hour grinding fetch-quest fest than a 9-hour action-packed adventure just because the former’s single player campaign might last a little longer. The whole “value” argument really doesn’t fly in any event. When I was growing up, I distinctly remember shelling out $75 in ones and fives for “Strider” on the Genesis. What was that game, like 2 hours? Don’t even get me started on Sonic and Streets of Rage, two classics that can be beaten in under an hour (if you’re good). Just have fun with your games, play what you think you will enjoy, and if you think it ends too quickly…play it again!

TMNT – Nintendo Game Boy Advance, Ubisoft (2007)

Ironically, the first modern game to do the franchise justice hearkens back to the classic Turtles beat ‘em ups of the late 80′s/early 90′s. Too bad it was easily lost in the shuffle and cast off by the casual observer as just one of the slew of typically disposable movie-based games released for the venerable GBA in its dying days.

For fans of the previous Turtles beat ‘em ups, this game is an excellent and logical extension. See the comparison below between the current game (above) and the 1989 Arcade game.

On the GBA, note that the colors are more muted than they were in the Arcade, but the resolution is much sharper – with highly detailed sprites and terrific combat animations. The music manages to be nearly as catchy and memorable as the previous entries, despite the absence of a theme song any of us would relate to. But most notably, the combat is deeper and much more free-flowing and skill-based while managing to retain the intuitive two-button control scheme of the earlier games. This isn’t the blind button masher it might appear to be on first blush. Deliberate, skillful play is rewarded. You might encounter an enemy with a large blunt weapon who breaks your combo with a block, forcing you to foot-sweep him to the ground, pick up his carcass and heave it into the next batch of thugs. When surrounded by enemies, you might leap into the air – not for the standard jump kick but maybe to repeatedly hit the “jump” button, making your turtle knee-stomp off the heads of several enemies, bouncing from one to another without ever touching the ground, racking up big numbers on the combo meter. Your turtle can tuck into his shell and roll away from enemies with a double-tap of the directional pad (some need to level-up before gaining this ability), adding a much-needed evasive maneuver. Parking meters can be smashed (an homage to the previous games) but also picked up and used as weapons, shurikens can be batted away with
a well-timed attack and also picked up and hurled back at enemies. It all makes for an extremely entertaining beat em up – true, enemies will come in thick waves, but the combat is so much fun, I don’t think fans of the genre will mind one bit.

All of this is bolstered by an interesting RPG-style experience point system, a shop to buy helpful items and abilities, diverting mini-games, and an Xbox 360-style achievement system – GREATLY increasing the longevity of what is, front to back, a fairly short game. Bonus points from me for including a rudimentary “New Game+” mode, meaning that once you’ve beaten it, you can replay the entire game at a higher difficulty with all of your character upgrades intact from the start. Make no mistake, this IS the best game of its kind of the GBA (eclipsing even FFone) and is easily the best Turtles game to come out in over a decade.

“YOU’RE TOO OLD” FACTOR*

Like most GBA titles, TMNT is a great game for someone who doesn’t have a ton of time to spend on gaming but finds him or her (?) self in need of a beat ‘em up fix every once in a while (who doesn’t get this feeling?). The total game consists of seven missions clocking in at around three or four hours of play time (you get bonus achievements for finishing it quicker). Unfortunately, there’s no “sleep” command, so if you find yourself needing to put down your GBA in the middle of a stage (because a client just asked you a question, or some silliness like that) you’ll need to replay it in its entirety. Not that that is a terrible thing – if you’re into these sorts of games, you know that they were made to be replayed over and over.

*People tend to grow up and have full social and professional lives, tragically leaving little time for video games. This section explains how easy or difficult it is to both fully enjoy the game and not get fired – divorced – shunned by society at the same time. Factors considered usually include story line, save opportunities, and replay value.

Burnout Paradise Demo: Quick Impressions / UPDATED

What the heck is this? Why should I have to take my eyes off the road in order to follow a little minimap or compass at the top of the screen. This is Burnout for Chrissakes – the racing series that has more in common with the white-knuckle shoot ‘em ups of old than Gran Turismo, the game that requires hand-eye coordination sharp enough to identify and deftly avoid the rear end of a bus (versus a harmless compact that can be effortlessly knocked away) while the scenery blurs past at 150 MPH. I really despise the general “Grand Theft Auto-fication” that’s been happening since that monstrosity rocked gaming in the early 2000′s. Burnout was great the way it was, but it had its areas for improvement that could have been addressed in a sequel — new, more varied and exciting race and combat modes could have been added, the “takedown” system could have been revamped into something a bit more skill-based or otherwise involved, gaining points and boost during races could have been less haphazard. Who asked for this?

UPDATE: Well, I feel like an ass now, but I’m obliged to report that Burnout:Paradise is actually friggin’ great. I spent about 5 hours with the full game last night when I should have been doing all sorts of other things, and was actually having a whole heck of a lot of fun. Yes, the open world stuff still was immensely off-putting at first and I still get annoyed when I get thrown off-track during a race. But the truth of the matter is that there is so much to do, and nearly all of it is enjoyable, so even when you do get lost it’s only a matter of time before you stumble across another event to try. No longer are you punished for a loss with a trip to the loading screen and, no doubt, an urge to force yourself to play that same event over and over. They ditched the whole star-rating system (event outcomes are a binary “first place=win, anything else=loss”) so gone is the obsessive need to replay events you just completed in order to line up a neat and clean rack of gold stars on your event menu. And that’s another thing. The more I played this game, the more the previous Burnout games felt somewhat disjointed and incomplete – a long (albeit still addictive) “to-do” list rather than an absorbing universe. I can remember times when I’d be playing “Revenge” and, for a brief moment, wish that I could just tool around with the car a bit just to see what it could do. Sometimes I would even do just that if a race was going poorly. In Paradise, not only can you do just that without penalty, but it’s actually encouraged. While completing events still unlocks the lion’s share of new content, like better cars, and upgrades to your license, just doing stuff like finding all of the secret areas, jumps, billboards to smash, and “mastering” every street (by tearing down it in the fastest time, getting the best “showtime” score, etc) serve to add to your completion percentage.

Best of all, they manages to retain the core feature of the series that should never be messed with: the sense of speed. The game sports high-res textures, tasteful use of realistic lighting, the standard awesome fictional car models, and runs at a 60 FPS clip that absolutely never falters, ever. Ever. Read that again. Oh, and there are no loading screens.

It’s interesting how much this game was misrepresented by its demo. I wonder what sort of effect this will have on publishers’ attitudes towards releasing demos in the future, given that the poor reception of the BOP demo undoubtedly led to some cancelled sales (just speculation on my part, and it remains to be seen how much that really affects the bottom line).

Resident Evil 4 – Nintendo Gamecube, Capcom (2005)

Never before has a gaming experience been so atmospheric, visceral, and immersive. The game’s meticulously detailed environments are only surpassed by its abundance of imaginative and horrifying enemies. Capcom daringly re-worked one of its flagship franchises and published an experience that should be undertaken by anyone who appreciates video games.

In Resident Evil 4, you assume the role of Leon S. Kennedy, co-star of previous installments of the series. Leon has been deployed to a mysterious decrepit European village in search of the President’s daughter. Hijinks ensue as Leon discovers the town is full of goddamned zomb…er… “infected villagers” who harbor a deep hatred towards prying Yankee bastards.

Gun battles from RE 4’s over-the-shoulder perspective far surpass the clunky and frustrating controls of the past. Pressing the right trigger aims your weapon, all of which are equipped with a laser sight for easy sniping. Leon isn’t particularly nimble, but the game’s handy “quick-turn” controls let Leon spin 180 degrees to cap any enemies bearing down on him from behind. The legendary RE “stop and pop” rules are in effect, as the player cannot fire a weapon while moving.

The enemies of RE 4 are downright relentless, and quickly test the player’s mastery of this new control scheme. Upon spotting Leon, foes love to get up close for gruesome melee attacks, and consistently attempt to flank the you. Enemy confrontations are accompanied by a dramatic crescendo in the game’s soundtrack, resulting in frantic and tension-filled moments as you feverishly attempt to reload your weapon before a chainsaw-wielding maniac decapitates you. The game’s monsters, for the most part, move at the same deliberate pace as Leon, which allow for challenging gameplay that never crosses the line into the realm of the “unfair.” For the most part, you will never be done in due to an enemy’s superior agility.

Boss battles have long been a Capcom staple, and RE 4 follows suit with some of the best ever staged. These monstrosities viciously attack Leon and can lead to some violent and dramatic deaths. There are no life bars, so the player depends on the mannerisms and appearance of the foe to determine if victory is near. To aid in these epic battles, “dodge” button presses are seamlessly interwoven into the action to allow for some harrowing escapes.

As far as presentation goes, Resident Evil 4 reeks of polish. Thought Leon is contained to a pre-determined path, the environments are meticulously detailed and fairly interactive. You will think twice about ambling down a dark abandoned prison hallway, illuminated only by a single hanging lamp. Visually, the game was nearly unsurpassed and still holds its own against seventh-generation consoles. Enemies react realistically to your gunfire, and Leon grips his chest and staggers about when your heath is low. RE 4’s cutscenes use the in-game engine and are a real treat to watch – just be sure not to set down your controller. The game’s visuals are nearly bested by its audio. From the dark and foreboding music to the shrieks of maniacal enemies, you’ll be hard-pressed to find a more immersive experience.

So what is wrong with this game? The inability to “strafe” may throw off some modern-style shooter fans. This is especially evident when enemies start hurling projectiles at Leon. The most effective way to defend a hatchet to the head is to shoot it out of the air, rather than sidestep. The weapon storage and management system is a bit archaic, calling for the player to essentially “pause” the game to equip a weapon. Additionally, some gamers may be turned off by the “Dragon’s Lair” controls that are interspersed throughout. Finally, for those with an HD display, the Gamecube version does run at 480p, but not in widescreen, causing thick black bars to border the top and bottom of the screen.

The Gamecube NTSC version of Resident Evil 4 boasts some attractive cover art, featuring Leon, some villagers, and the RE 4 logo. For a game of this caliber, one wishes that the cover was a bit less “noisy” as the franchise should probably be able to sell on name-recognition alone. The game is contained on two white Gamecube mini-discs, which is really not a problem, but something to keep in mind.

Resident Evil 4 is a thrilling ride, beginning to end. For Xbox owners who missed out, it may even be worth forking over the $80 or so for the title + the cube. For RE fans or collectors who simply want to amass “classic” games of the console generations, this is a must-own.

“YOU’RE TOO OLD” FACTOR*

RE4 is a game that makes you envy those prepubescent little hellions who have no responsibilities besides rattling off 8-12 hours of World of Warcraft. The story is pretty compelling, even if a little cliché, and the presentation makes you want to press on throughout the night. That being said, there’s probably at least a solid 20-25 minutes between most save points, and the game stretches on for a good 20 hours. Some gamers might reach a point where they are literally begging for a save opportunity to preserve hard-earned progress before having to cash out for the night. Overall, I’d recommend setting aside at least an hour’s worth of playtime for each RE4 session. If that sounds like it would be tough to fit into your schedule…then MAKE it fit, dammit.

*People tend to grow up and have full social and professional lives, tragically leaving little time for video games. This section explains how easy or difficult it is to both fully enjoy the game and not get fired – divorced – shunned by society at the same time. Factors considered usually include story line, save opportunities, and replay value.

Gaming in the New Generation

I can distinctly remember the first time being duly impressed and genuinely excited by a video game. Because it was around 1989 or so, this event naturally occurred in the context of a Video Arcade – really the only place one could truly experience cutting edge gaming technology those days. It seemed as though every mall, pizza parlor, and miniature golf course had some amount of space dedicated to a cluster of gaudy cabinets. The pizza joints would usually have some of the (from our perspective) older tabletop-style games like Pac-Man or Galaga, while our mall (not the shoddy local mall, of course, but the one 20 minutes away) would have an entire room filled with a combination of non-video arcade games like skeeball and hoop-shooting alongside dense rows of beat ‘em ups, shoot ‘em ups, vs. fighters, and sit-down racers. To me, the experience of playing one of these games always felt like a larger than life experience – for a quarter, you were given the privilege of experiencing a few minutes of beautiful, high-resolution 2D graphics and special effects, crystal clear music and voice samples, and the use of a joystick, buttons, steering wheel, light gun, or whatever, that felt just right. The difference between the gaming experience here and at home was miles wide. There was no sprite flicker or slowdown in The Arcade. Licensed games look exactly as they should – the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles yelled “Cowabunga” and looked just like they did in the cartoon, as did The Simpsons and the X-Men, and and the NBA players looked like themselves. There were no throwaway boss fights or restrained use of on-screen enemies in The Arcade. There were no cheat codes or Game Genie. Once you spent that second life or the last few seconds ticked away before you reached a check point, you were done. Very, very, rarely did you ever witness the “ending” to one of these games. All of this added to the mystique of Arcade gaming, and made every visit an exciting time. I remember my brothers I on summer vacation, armed with a roll of quarters each, actually took the time to plan which games to tackle first, not wanting to frivolously drop the coins into a machine that would provide anything less than a memorable gaming experience.

Nowadays I try to piece together why the “mystique” of gaming – that sense of excitement upon experiencing a new, cutting edge game – has faded a bit in recent times. I don’t think it is a coincidence that this intangible but noticeable decline has occurred at the same time as Arcades have all but disappeared from the scene. Now, the latest in gaming happens right before your eyes in the comfort of your home – not in a loud, cramped public place filled with angry kids grubbing for quarters and fighting for “stick time.” Home consoles have caught up to, surpassed, and effectively left arcade technology comfortably behind them over the past 15 years or so. This should be the perfect time to be a Gamer. This should be ideal. But it isn’t.

There are tons of opinions as to why this might be. One could go on about how modern games eschew gameplay for graphics and presentation. Some might say genres like sports and shooting games are over-complicated when we really still yearn for simplicity. Maybe modern games try too hard to be realistic, ironically sacrificing fun for tedium by mimicking the intricacies of everyday life – right down to the grind of checking email and being on-time for appointments. Perhaps the recent mainstreaming of gaming has led to developers experiencing greater time-crunches from anxious publishers, resulting in the release of rushed, buggy products that are later completed under the guise of downloadable “patches.”

But maybe it’s something simpler than all that. I was overjoyed to be able to download the aforementioned Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Konami, 1989) via the Xbox Live Arcade back in March and play cooperatively online with Scott, who lives at the other end of the Turnpike. And it was definitely fun. But it wasn’t the same. Something wasn’t quite right: I was playing Ninja Turtles with an Xbox controller, not the brightly colored, sucker-shaped joystick and indented arcade buttons. That’s the thing. In The Arcade, each cabinet was dedicated to playing just one game. Smash TV had two joysticks for each gamer and no other buttons besides “Start” because, well, that’s all you needed. Street Fighter II had a corndog-shaped joystick that snapped into each of the eight positions with a reassuring click. Roadblasters’ steering wheel had two triggers for firing and a thumb button for the special weapon. The 6-player X-Men (pictured via racketboy.com) had two friggin’ monitors slapped next to one another for a “widescreen” experience and so that all six players could play in comfort. On the home console, you usually have just one controller that is supposed to play every single game. Sure, it works fine for the most part, but some of that mystique is lost here.

It may not have anything to do with cabinets. Maybe its just that when you play these new games, you aren’t in some exciting, energetic environment surrounded by fellow game lovers. You’re just on your couch, playing on your own TV, with the realities of life like papers or bills sitting a few feet (inches?) away, and you’re perhaps thinking of all the things you should be doing other than playing these games.

I’m not saying we’re necessarily worse off for having all this great technology and all these (undoubtedly) great games at our fingertips. But as gaming gets bigger and bigger, I think that the stuff that made some of us Gamers in the first place – that excitement I mentioned at the outset – is further and further diluted. Today, we buy our gaming consoles from huge corporations, the same ones that, 10 or 15 years ago, were known for fancy operating systems and the “Walkman.” Even our old friend, Nintendo, seems more hell-bent on including Grandma in the equation than truly catering to the hardcore fans they cultivated in 1984. Game budgets and advertising has reached insane, hollywood-esque levels.

And through it all, I can’t recall the last time I was as truly excited, happy, even, to be playing a game as I was back in those old Arcades – even for just those few minutes. Arcade games had to be fun, the entire time. No extended cut scenes just to show off the latest graphics engine or big-name voice talent. No loading screens with indiscreet product placement. If you weren’t having fun, the developers knew you’d just take your quarters and go.

Does that sort of incentive exist for developers and publishers in today’s gaming world? Do they really care about those of us that have been gaming since the heyday of the Arcade? Have they been gaming since those days?

If anything, it’s an extremely interesting time to be a Gamer, especially an adult who has observed this sort of steady evolution first-hand. I just hope that the mystique, the essence of gaming that was captured so well in those old Arcades can somehow live on.